I don’t want to…
Get up and go for a walk this morning – I feel tired and achy inside.
I don’t want to…
Get out of bed at all, although those dreams I had last night made me feel so stressed.
Waiting for an elevator to take me to the top – all the elevators were heading down.
Trying to call her on my phone – I kept pushing the wrong numbers over and over…

I don’t want to…
Close my eyes – the dreams I have always cause me to crash.
I don’t want to…
Spend the night searching for answers when all I do is search during the day. Is it that I am a dreamer that has caused my reality to come crashing down? I seem to keep on waiting for the ride to the top but it’s nowhere to be found.

I believe…
It’s this belief that has kept me walking straight and standing tall.
I believe…
There is no expiration date on this beliefs but I wonder how much longer I have…
Until the night devours me and spits me out towards the morning – the morning thrashes me and catapults me towards the late afternoon and early evening…then it begins again….

Lost in this winding road, can find my way out and can’t find my way home…
Signs point me in the wrong direction or perhaps I am reading them wrong?
Living a life in a self deception and feeling if it’s been me behind the mask all along?
Lost in this wilderness…
I don’t want to…
Be free…
I don’t want to…
Lose sight of me…
I have these stories to tell, words to print and love to give…Am I simply in a maze of self destruction? How do I remind myself of the truth inside of me?
I need to…
See my own reflection and remember who I am.
I need to…
Sometimes I just can’t find the desire to remember – perhaps out of fear of another failed attempt to win?