The autumn of our discontent. Discontent is too weak a word to describe the pain, sadness and anger we feel.

Friday, October 6th started and ended like every Friday. The difference was we were preparing to celebrate, Shabbat, the Jewish holidays of Shemini Hatzeret and then, Simcha Torah.

I woke up at around 4 or 5 the next morning to use the bathroom, I came back to bed and instinctively I looked at my phone and noticed several alerts of Palestinians infiltrating into Israel and mass casualties.

I never imagined the updates we would receive as the days passed.

Before 10/7, there were so many aspects in life which made us smile, upset, confused and sad.

Trivial life pressures and less trivial pressures.
We had baseball, arguments between friends and family, bills way overdue and the frustration of life’s wants and needs and the inability to find a way to earn them.

Myself and others in my boat, we walked similarly. Eyes focused on nothing in particular, a slight limp and not dressed as we should at our age, but dressed as we felt. Old jeans, t-shirt and a hoodie. We were close to being beaten and getting closer and closer to the end of our story. So many things we had not achieved and no hope that we ever would. It sounds like we are losers, we are not. But show me one person who can say they have achieved everything they wanted in life and I will show you a liar.

As the hours passed and the full extent of the atrocities began to reveal themselves. A new darkness descended. A darkness which could no longer be illuminated and would stay dark forever, no amount of time and sympathy can erase the devastating pain and death that was done by the children of Arafat and Hitler.

At first there was a worldwide shock and sympathy. Then the hatred came out and spread like COVID did back in 2020.

Literally millions of people marched and chanted terrible words of hatred against the Jewish people.
Thousands cheered on Hamas and blamed the Jews for causing the massacre. Posters were placed with the faces and some information about a hostage being held.
People began to tear off the posters. These were hung around the world to show that each hostage was not a number or a name. They are humans. They are being held hostage by the same barbaric group of people who perpetrated and destroyed thousands of worlds on October 7th.

We prayed.
We posted our emotions.
We watched the videos of the Pogrom and we cried.
Our people, our family deployed into the IDF. Not one complained about the job that needed to be done once and for all.

We looked for answers.
We rationalized God’s absence during that day. Celebrate the few who survived. There are no answers to why this would happen to a people simply because they do not adhere to the same faith, the same laws.

Yet… we wonder, what sort of god would approve of October 7th?

I search for answers but there are none. God has given His Creations free reign and the evil feel empowered by raping, beheading and killing. The devil’s children in their crusade to create their caliphate world.

I still ask, why?
I hear the same old responses from knowledgeable people. A blended drink with some Kool Aid mixed in. Praising the almighty.

I praise the Almighty but I balk at the answers people tend to pontificate and stress as the answer.

There are no answers to what has happened to this world. October 7th was the entrance towards the exit.

I pray and I believe in my God. What other choice do I have?
I pray for the exit to be an entrance towards a utopian existence.
I pray.